received a call from my dad at 7.06pm, telling my that my father side grandpa passed away on friday night.
maybe there is really somthing psychic about it, no wonder these days i kept dreaming about my family and having the feeling something is happening there. just i kept forgetting to call. my mother also say my dad's heart was feeling weak on that particular night. what they say blood is thicker than water, now i know it really is true.
i m not very close to my grandpa, but after hearing the news, just can't stop crying. i also dunno why exactly. i don't miss him that much. he had been a man of very few words and never showed me much affection. but i just felt this enormous sadness that made me cry and cry.
in the past 7 yrs he'd been suffering from various disease including kidney failure, parkinson, stomach disease, heart disease, stroke, and recently discovered diabetes. his death didn't quite catch us by surprise, like my grandma's one did. grandma passed away 3 months and 1 week ago. she'd been taking care of my grandpa for soooo many yrs that he was totally dependent on her. it's not surprising that he wouldn't last long without her. the doctor said his organs all deteriorated. the illness had eaten him up. the physical and emotional suffering is probably too much and it might really be a relief for him now.
3 months ago i encountered the first loss of a close relative, and now so soon the second one. it might be a good thing that i m not home. coz i dunno how to face death yet. it puts a veil on everybody nearby and the veil is so heavy everything just lost its colour. my parents had done all the necessary things and never call me to go back, coz they think i m busy with my work here and quite no point for me to go back. but afterall, my grandpa is someone whose surname i carry...